“I am enCOuraging you to be COurageous, look hard, and identify your usual response. It’s the one that pops out before you have taken a breath. This is the response that can trap you in a vicious cycle of disCOnnection with the person you love best.” ~Dr. Sue Johnson
“I am encouraging you to be courageous, look hard, and identify your usual response. It’s the one that pops out before you have taken a breath. This is the response that can trap you in a vicious cycle of disconnection with the person you love best.” ~Dr. Sue Johnson
CUPles™ therapy
COCOA CUPles Therapy Inc. ™
Creating Open-hearted Conversations with One Another
EFT for CUPles™ (EFCT)
Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy EFCT is a structured, short-term approach designed to help CUPles™ improve their relationships, typically lasting between 8 to 20 sessions. Developed in the 1980s, it is rooted in the science of attachment, which examines how people form and maintain emotional bonds. EFCT combines a focus on reshaping partners’ emotional experiences with a structured approach to changing how they interact with one another.
During sessions, CUPles™ explore their emotional responses, learn to communicate their needs more effectively, and work together to break the negative patterns and cycles that create disCOnnection. The goal is to build stronger, more secure, and deeply COnnected relationships that foster trust, closeness, and understanding.
Source: ICEEFT
Goals
- To expand and re-organize key emotional responses and, in the process, the organization of self.
- To create a positive shift in partners interactional positions and patterns.
- To foster the creation of a secure bond between partners.
Extensive research demonstrates the effectiveness of EFCT, showing significant, long-lasting positive changes in relationships. It has been successfully applied with a diverse range of CUPles™ in settings such as private practices, university training centers, and hospital clinics. Emerging research also indicates its benefits for CUPles™ dealing with specific challenges, including depression, trauma-related anxiety, medical conditions, and issues surrounding forgiveness.
Source: ICEEFT
EFCT is utilized globally with varied cultural groups—including specific applications for African American CUPles™—and educational levels across North America, Australia, New Zealand, Europe, Africa, and Asia. It is effectively used with diverse relationship structures and CUPles™ from all backgrounds.
Source: ICEEFT
Emotional Focused Therapy with African American Couples: Love Heals
The Relationship Recipe
How to Brew Connection
Secure COnnection doesn’t happen by accident. It’s brewed on purpose, one intentional pour at a time. When the world feels COld, your relationship should feel like a warm place to land. At COCOA Cup Therapy, we build resilient bonds with A.R.E. Accessibility, Responsiveness, and Engagement.
The Core Ingredients
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Accessibility | Be Reachable: Show up. Respond in a reasonable time. Hold eye contact that says, “I’m here with you.”
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Responsiveness | Be Soft: Speak their love language. Choose softness over silence. Prioritize repair over retreat.
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Engagement | Be Present: Lead with COmpassion. Stay in the moment. Listen to hold, not just to fix.
The Brewing Process
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Stir Gently: Prioritize nervous system care through prayer, meditation, and safe touch.
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Infuse with Joy: Keep the connection light with shared playlists, deep laughter, and small, intentional moments.
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Simmer in Grace: Healing takes time. Give room for imperfection as you learn to reSTORY your relationship.
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Serve Warm: Make the choice to come back to each other—especially after the hard parts.
